Front Porch thoughts on Mother's Day!

Front Porch thoughts on Mother's Day!

With Mother’s Day upon us, it has me all in my feelings about this holiday. My mom passed away nearly twenty-three years ago, and I still miss her so much. If you are a person who tends to overlook Mother’s Day, this column is especially for you.

All my life, I have known men who protest this holiday along with most other holidays set aside to express love through gift giving, pomp and circumstance. Now, anyone who has known me for five minutes knows how I go all out for birthdays, but that is a column for another time. Because if we are being honest, birthdays deserve their own special day.

Growing up, I do not remember any particular traditions or grand expressions of love being poured out for my mom. My mom was the doer of all things in our house. She was a fabulous cook. She handled the bills, the errands, the household chores, and everything involving me and my brother.

As a child, I remember giving her little crafts we made at school, going to church on Sunday, maybe a barbecue at my aunt’s house, or a Sunday-Funday at my grandma’s with all my cousins. I am not sure why my dad did not do more demonstrative things to make my mom feel valued or thought of. My mom was easygoing and rarely said much when she felt unheard or unrecognized, even when it mattered to her. But as I got older, I remember feeling some type of way about it and longing for a love that would intentionally do both of those things.

There are naysayers who suggest this holiday was created as a marketing ploy by major retailers and businesses everywhere to guilt people into doling out dough to make moms feel special. I will give it to you and say maybe you are correct.

Many people argue that you should not need one day to make someone feel special. And maybe you are the kind of person who does so daily. But I guess it is lost on me why anyone would go so far out of their way to avoid lifting up and acknowledging someone they love.

Many say, “You are not my mom!” And you may be correct in that.

However, ponder this:

I did not give birth to you, but I celebrate your birthday.

I have nothing to do with your job, but I celebrate your promotion.

I have nothing to do with your education, but I celebrate your graduation.

I am sure you are getting the picture here.

It is about acknowledging something that pertains to a person you love and care about and doing your part to make them feel special.

How you achieve this is entirely up to you. You can buy flowers or jewelry, plan a weekend getaway, or make reservations at a favorite restaurant and spend lots of money. Most moms can appreciate being spoiled and showered with attention.

But if you are like most mom's, what you really want is to feel thought of and valued. And you can do that in ways that do not cost very much money at all.

Sometimes it is doing the things you would normally do anyway, but doing them with intention.

Many guys make breakfast every Sunday. But putting it on a tray, adding a few flowers plucked from the yard in a vase, or grabbing her favorite pastry from the family’s favorite donut spot can suddenly make something ordinary feel intentional.

A sweet card with a sentimental note can matter. Bringing the kids to pick out something for mom can matter. Spending the day doing the things she enjoys can matter.

Maybe she is an overtired mom who simply wants to sleep in, take a nap, or have someone else prepare the meal prep for the week.

You see, it is not about money. It is about intention and attention.

And if you have been feeling salty about celebrating Mother’s Day, with all your justified reasons lined up so you can pull the covers over your head and sleep the day away in protest… I hope you don’t.

I hope you get the card and write the note.

I hope you cook the meal and spend the time.

I hope you let your mom, the mother of your children, or any mom you know and love understand that she is cherished, valued, and worth spending one of the greatest commodities we have on her…

T-I-M-E.